SWEET SURRENDER

Today

Today was a good day and I have many things to be thankful for.  This morning, I actually woke up at 6:40 and was quite excited until Rowan woke up about 10 minutes later to nurse and then after 15 minutes or so decided to wake up early.  However, I can see the good in this because I found out something I had not known before.  When I first woke, I thought to myself how perfect it would be to go sit and practice advanced pranayama (breath work).  When Rowan woke up, I decided to take him to my yoga mat with me.  I have not done that for a long time.  When he was a baby, I would practice yoga and have him lying on his sheep skin next to me and he would fall to sleep because the vibe was so peaceful.  And today, he just sat next to me, so still and quietly, observing my practice and I was able to totally focus in on what I was doing.  After about 15 minutes he got a bit restless and started searching out toys.  After practicing deep breath work, it is good to rest in corpse pose (on your back) and completely relax your body and mind, incorporating the vibration of breath into your being.  So, when he started getting antsy, I took his cue that my time was ending, and got into a quick final relaxation.  This part of the practice was not as deep for me as it would have been if I had been solo, but that is a good challenge to work around I am sure.  Anyhow, I was happy to remember how important it is to have my children observe me from time to time doing this practice that recharges my soul and brings me closer to God.  This is not to say that I don't strive to live my yoga, but I am sure that small children being exposed to asana and pranyama must be a wonderful thing.  So, I am thankful of the reminder to share this with my children from time to time and to connect with Rowan in this way.

We also had a good day in regards to food preparation.  I got my Kombucha started!  Hurrah.  And some raw falafel (made of sprouted garbanzos) in the dehydrator.  The boys helped with this and Rowan ate several bites of it, exclaiming "YUM, good!" several times.  Silas also liked it, so I hope it turns out well once dehydrated.   I also got another dehydrated treat made up- nori sheets spread with a spicy pine nut and walnut  pate.  In the cooked world of food, I got some spicy black bean burgers made up for the freezer (a triple batch, so that we have some convenience food) and made a pretty gourmet raw dinner to boot.

In the home school world, Silas had a good day.  He is making a calendar, so he worked on two of the grids.  He has a large piece of drawing paper that he has to measure a 1" border on the sides and bottom, and a 3" border across the top.  He then divides the remainder of the paper into 2" squares.  He has a lot of focus doing this and is enjoying it.  He also read two non-fiction books.  One on anacondas and one called weird and wild reptiles or something like that.  We played a game of Harry Potter "clue" which he won.  Rowan and I read books and he helped me in the kitchen a ton!  He really enjoys measuring and scooping and any little thing he can do.  It's a nice time.  We also had some outdoor time and cleared out some of the flowers and plants from the summer. 

Last week, my first week out of yoga school, was a bit hectic despite the fact that we didn't have to make the trip.  This week felt nice to have two whole days to just mellow out together, so that was nice.  We are truly blessed! 

winding down

Wow, I can barely believe it, but I only have two weeks left and I will be done with my yoga teacher training.  Almost every week since February, the boys and I have made the trek down to Indy, so that I can attend my program on Thursday evenings. 

I never could have imagined how this would change the dynamic of my week until I experienced it.  The things that I didn't think about were that in the time frame between Monday and Wednesday, we had to get laundry done and folded (including diapers and diaper covers), errands ran, and food prepped for the trip.  The food prep was really my own added stress.  Steve's mom and dad (who graciously took us in with shelter and childcare every week) would have been happy to feed me, I just have quirky dietary standards.  So, the packing and unpacking each week took a portion of our three free weekdays where we had to also fit in yoga practice, social functions, home school activities and learning, house cleaning, oil changes, hobbies,etc.  This was one aspect that was unexpected.  Oh, yes each week was packing for not only myself, but the two boys.   The other thing that threw me off was how tired I would feel on Friday nights when arriving home, I suppose from all the travel.  Eating  a bunch of raw food through the middle of this training helped a lot in that aspect though.  The other thing that surprised me was how quickly the time passed from Saturday to Wednesday when once again I had to prepare to leave.  It was a saving grace that I took practically the whole summer off from teaching.  Because now that I am teaching 2-3 classes a week again, it makes that 5 days in between go even faster!

I think that I now have a deeper appreciation of how much time there is in one week when I don't have to go away.  On the weeks that I had a break, I was amazed at how much more space an extra two mornings, afternoons, and evenings can create.  I think at first, when I get to reclaim this space for other purposes than ytt and traveling, I am going to thoroughly appreciate the time.  I wonder how long it will take before I forget and begin to feel like my week goes too fast and that there is not enough time.  I hope that I will savor the space for awhile. 

I am looking forward to focusing my energies in other areas of my life that have been on the back burner.  Completing my Birthing from Within certification and attending more births.  I have really missed doulaing this year.  I couldn't be on call, so I couldn't take any births.  I am also excited about growing my business and networking with others in my area, so that my birthing from within classes and Itsy Bitsy yoga classes can take off.  I am so thankful for all the clients and students I have had over the past few years that have found their way to me (without much advertising on my part) and have supported the expense of all my training and learning.  And now I am ready to watch my business of service to pregnant women and their families grow.  I actually feel like I am about to graduate from college finally.  It is funny how this alternative route to education which has entailed me to work my booty off doesn't get the same recognition as a college degree.  It doesn't really matter to me so much, it is more of an observation.  I am just addicted to learning!  I can't wait to attend more yoga workshops and Birthing From Within retreats, but at least for awhile when I do these things, they won't require any more home study. 

So, I am feeling it.  I am ready to tackle my last 5-6 months so that I can send in my advanced home study for Birthing From Within and I will be done for awhile.  Yippee!!! 

Favorite Daily Rituals

Dry Skin Brushing!  Have you tried this?  I have to say I love it.  I used to do this daily a few years back and sometime during my pregnancy with Rowan, I got out of the groove-replaced I am sure by spreading belly oil on my growing belly.  This spring, as I experienced a small cleanse with my liver flush, I started back with the skin brushing.  You can obtain one of these brushes at a health food store.  To use it, you brush your dry skin, always stroking toward your heart.  Make sure to do your extremities (i.e. your feet and hands) and along your sides.  The skin brush is not suitable for the skin on your face, neck or breasts (they are too sensitive).  I have seen a smaller brush that is made for doing your face and neck though which would be fun to try.  It's fun to see how well your circulation is flowing by how red your skin turns after brushing.  I always turn bright red just about everywhere when I am juice feasting.   I have noticed a better overall texture to my skin while doing this practice as it removes dead skin cells.  I try to rinse my brush after using it and it is always dry by the next day.

Photo Sharing - Video Sharing - Share Photos - Free Video HostingAnd the Neti PotOh how I love the Neti Pot.  This too was an old ritual that faded, but happily has found its way back into my life thanks to motivation from my yoga teacher training.  The neti pot is a purification ritual that involves running warm salt water through your sinuses with the little pot.  My breathing passages are so much clearer while doing it and I can totally tell if I miss a morning of doing it.  If I miss the morning, I usually do it in the afternoon or evening. I think the process has been moving out some toxins over the past few weeks off and on in combination with cleaning up my diet so much over the summer.  My ears have been phasing in and out of feeling a bit plugged up and one night I got a full on ear ache.  Ouch!  It was horrible, but thank God-Us, it lasted only a short time.  I am hoping this will pass soon.  Detoxing is not really fun to go through, but I am happy to be ridding my body of all this stuff so that I can be a healthy person.   Did anyone check out the link to the Angela Stokes song I put the link to awhile back?  I love the verse"When your stomach hurts, when your colon aches because you're eating SAD (standard American diet).  Simply remember to eat more raw foods and then you won't feel so BAD!"  We were watching the you tube of it today and after the first time through, Rowan said "more song."  Very cute. 
Photo Sharing - Video Sharing - Share Photos - Free Video HostingAnyhow, these rituals make me feel groovy and I hope maybe I have inspired you to give one or both of them a go!

A time of blossoming- a long story about raw foods

Wow!  A lot of changes have been going on within me.  As you have probably noticed, I have renamed this here blog to Sweet Surrender which seems to be more heart felt and fitting to me.

The most consuming thing that has been going on for me is my new journey into experimenting with raw foods.  I have been eating about 97% raw for the past three weeks.  I started out with the intention of going for 10 days, but I just felt so darn good I decided to continue for awhile longer.  I really can't believe the changes that just three weeks can bring.  I feel like my senses are more alive.  I feel increased energy.  I haven't really lost weight (I don't own a scale so I can't know for sure), but I definitely can feel my body changing and my clothes feeling looser.  I feel mucous leaving my body.  Elimination is above average.  The appearance of my skin is improving.  I feel so much gratitude and blessed.  I feel drawn to nature and have been spending tons of time outdoors.  I feel less afraid and more at peace.  I feel like I am rewiring my thought grooves.

This is a big one for me and maybe the main reason why I am doing this, for reprogramming.  I have recently been reminded of the fact that when you think a thought, it creates a thought groove in your mind.  The more you think this thought, the deeper the groove becomes.  This happens with all of your thoughts, so the ones you think over and over again are forming deep valleys in your minds until they are so deeply penetrated that any experience that you have is filtered through these and you can only perceive reality through these thought patterns you have formed.  This really blows my mind especially when I heard that the thoughts you thought today are probably the same thoughts you have had every day for years. 

You can gently reprogram yourself, but it defintely takes an awareness of what you are thinking and a redirecting.  You have to be quite persistant.  Yoga and breathwork can also help a shift in this area to occur.  I feel like I am even more aware of my mind chatter while on raw foods and I feel like a lot of the negative self talk that I have been doing for years is being replaced with positive thoughts.  This is a liberating feeling. 

I am also working right now at freeing the love warrior within myself.  This part of me is the woman who is awake at each moment, making the best decisions for herself (myself) with every twist and turn in life.  I am learning from the book I am reading The Craft of the Warrior (see book list) that habits can keep the loved warrior suppressed from her true shining self.  So, I feel like coming onto a raw foods diet has shaken up every single food pattern that I have had.  I am moving into new territory and my love warrior is coming out to play.  It is an adventure that so far has been absolute joy. 

I am not sure where this diet change is going to lead.  A part of myself is concerned with going 100% raw because it is just another belief system that can tie up my love warrior and I definitely don't want that to happen.  How I feel right now and goals I am setting for myself is that I will continue this for awhile longer and then if I do decide I want to eat raw foods, I will just try to eat as much raw as possible on any given day.   I know, however, that I have several pounds of beans and rice in my home due to being part of a food buying club and I feel like I need to lovingly prepare those for my family.  I could just go cold turkey and clear out the cuppboards, but that doesn't feel right to me (especially with the goal of financial freedom so that we can finally buy some land that we have been dreaming of for years!).  But right now I feel like if I ate at the maximum four cooked meals per week (oh just typing this sounds like sooo many, so maybe less) I could maintain the good sense of well being I have come into.  I think I would eat beans and whole grains and cooked vegetables, and I have been craving eggs, but we have an excellent farmer who pastures the hens that we buy them from.  I also think that with ANY cooked meal 50% of it would be raw because it is my understanding that the body doesn't have as severe of a reaction to cooked foods if they are consumed with at least half of them being raw.  These are the thoughts that are whirling through my mind. 

Honestly right now, I feel like I could eat raw for a long, long time.  I am not sure how I would feel in the winter since I live in a four season climate, but I have read some recipes that you can gently warm that sound like they may help.  I also know that supporting a local community of grower's and farmers is important to me, so although I have bought tropical items, this week I have only been eating what I have obtained from my farmer's market ( except for two bananas) which feels really right.  I also have been really inspired to start growing my own food and although we have very limited sunny spots in my yard, I have double dug two garden spots to plant a fall crop of greens,lettuces, beets, carrots and raddish. This is also making me question if we could create a cold frame for winer greens.  I am also quite interested in starting an indoor sprout garden and growing wheat grass, sunflower, and buckwheat greens.  I ate some cooked potatoes today that my friend Keith grew organically with love and gifted us with.  I felt pretty good after eating them.  I read in Viktoras Kuluinskas book Survival into the 21st century, that if you eat some cooked root veggies, that is probably preferable over too many nuts and seeds which I would like to use sparingly because I know if I was shelling all those nuts and seeds that I eat, I would be eating a lot less!

A couple last thoughts.   I am really inspire by Victoria Boutenko's book Green For Life.(again look at side bar)  I have been making a few green smoothies a week but would like to incorporate them daily.  Vicotria has a newly revised book out called Twelve Steps to Raw that I am eagerly waiting to read.  I would also like to research more about pregnancy and the raw foods diet because possibly by the end of the year I may like to become pregnant again.  I think if I do turn to raw foods, it will be a very gradual process, but I have definitely given up white flour, white sugar, and high fructose corn syrup for life!  All I know is that I feel pretty darn awesome right now and let me tell you, yoga in combination with the raw high is amazing!  I was practicing advanced pranayama (breath work) the other day and steve called.  When I answered the phone (which I had to because he was Really trying to get a hold of me -he called the house phone. my cell phone, and then the house phone once again), I could hardly even speak to him and bring myself down to that earthly level.  I was so BLISSED!  I have to say too, I love being blissed!  I have also found some amazing inspiring raw blogs and websites, so I hope to be updating my side bar soon, so that I can share these with you (Aimee, my only for sure reader tee-hee). 

Well, if you actually stopped by here and read to the end of this long winded post, thanks so much!   

Inspired by this post, I decided to create my own rendition.  Although the camera I use, a Kodak DX3700 (which by the way belongs to Silas-that's right I don't even own a digital camera) does not begin to create the photo I was hoping for.  Although, I am certainly aware that the problem could just as easily be the photographer.  I need to pick up a book at the library and start learning how to take better photos.  I am enjoying my journey into learning about this though.  So, now ....

YOGA NIGHT

Photo Sharing - Upload Video - Video Sharing - Share PhotosTonight was my last class before a two and half week break.  And although I LOVE my job of teaching prenatal yoga, it is nice to have some time off.  However, I am still a full time student, so I will be sure to keep busy studying.
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SNOW, BLUEBERRY MUFFINS, AND YOGA

We're having pretty bad weather conditions here.  The roads are bad with snow and the wind is blowing it around so much that they are hard to keep clear.  We are supposed to get some more accumulation tonight.  I had to cancel my yoga classes this evening and so that frees up some time to do a post.  Hurrah!

This morning, I made some blue berry muffins for breakfast.  These are a favorite around here.  It is not uncommon for me to make them weekly.  The recipe is a formulation of the "create a muffin" recipe that is found in The Complete Tightwad Gazette.  I like them because they are quick and relatively inexpensive to make.

Blueberry muffin recipe:

Mix together 3 cups flour (I use whole grain spelt) and 1 TBSP baking powder.

Mix together 2 eggs, 1/4 cup + 2 TBSP oil, a scant 1/2 cup of maple syrup, and 1 1/2 cups milk.

Mix the wet and dry ingredients together (using the least amount of strokes possible).

Gently fold in about 1 cup frozen blueberries. 

This is enough batter to fill 12 muffin cups.  I have to spray my muffin tin first.  Bake for 20 min. (give or take 5 minutes) at 400 degrees until inserted toothpick comes out clean.  Let muffins sit in tin for 5 minutes before removing.  YUM!

On the yoga mat, Silas is creating his own poses!!

Introducing "Down Twist":

                                                            

And "Backwards Down Twist!"